MILWAUKEE (The Borowitz Report)—In an extraordinary display of devotion to their presidential nominee, attendees at the Republican National Convention on Wednesday eagerly donated their vital organs to Donald J. Trump. After the party faithful made their donations, Trump indicated he would sell the harvested kidneys, lungs, and other human parts to pay his legal bills. “We’re moving very strongly on spleen, very strongly on pancreas,” he told Fox News. But, according to one knowledgeable source, Trump’s quest for organs is far from over. “I can think of one he needs,” said Stormy Daniels. |