WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Offering an explanation for his sweeping tariffs on foreign films, on Tuesday Donald J. Trump argued that movies with subtitles “encourage reading.” “Parents think their kids are safely at the movies, not spending two hours reading,” he said. “This should never be allowed to happen in our country.” Calling the practice of reading “disgusting, quite frankly,” Trump said that the tariffs would cut off reading “at the source.” In his most dire warning, he claimed that reading subtitles could lead Americans to read books, and eventually the Constitution. Only One Day Left to Save 40% on a Paid TBR Subscription!For only $30 a year, get access to all the premium features of TBR, including the Sunday Read, Traitor of the Week, and every episode of The Andy Borowitz Show. Sale ends at 9 AM Eastern tomorrow (Wednesday). Don’t miss out!© 2025 Andy Borowitz |