To the American people:Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Joseph Boakai, and I am the president of Liberia.This week I had a most unusual meeting with your president, Donald Trump, at the White House.If you will bear with me, I would like to share my thoughts about what occurred.In our meeting, President Trump expressed admiration bordering on astonishment for my mastery of the English language, seemingly unaware that English is the official language of Liberia. For these remarks, President Trump earned an avalanche of mockery from the global media. I believe this reaction was extremely unfair, for the following reasons: First, it is only natural that the president would be surprised to encounter an African who speaks comprehensibly, since the African he has spent the most time with is Elon Musk. Second, President Trump is known for many things—his dancing, for example, and his eccentric use of capital letters—but he is not famous for his knowledge of Africa. This is, after all, a man who, in 2017, referred to the African nation of “Nambia”—a mythical land entirely of his own invention. And third, there is a final reason why President Trump should not be criticized for complimenting my ability to speak English. He himself is living proof that you can be from an English-speaking country and still be unable to speak it. And so, as a gift to the good people of the United States, I would like to make the following offer: I am willing to return to your country on a regular basis to teach your president English. I recognize that, between bombing Iran and sending troops to Home Depot, President Trump is a busy man, so these English lessons can be scheduled at his convenience. Also, if he has friends who might benefit from such instruction, I would be happy to include them in our classes. Marjorie Taylor Greene and Tommy Tuberville come to mind. I cannot promise you that I will be able to teach President Trump to speak English as fluently as a Liberian. But perhaps I can teach him, once and for all, what the word “tariff” means. With all my best wishes, President Joseph Boakai |